So we're dying

"You're killing me," he said,
"with silence
and sullen eyes full of meaning.
I can hear the silent screams
echoing."

"You're killing me," he said,
"with inaction.
You move in slow motion
and the impact crushes
the bones.

"You're killing me," he said,
"with neglect.
Your eyes they look through me,
your hands barely touch me...
I am cold."

"You're killing me," he said,
"with yourself:
taking me down like kamikaze,
hitting me with not-so-friendly fire.
So we're dying."

Tenderness

You promised to be with me forever
And to love me until time ends
But I want to ask
One more thing of you
Promise me your tenderness

When everyone is running so fast
And I feel like I've been left behind
Promise me you'll shorten your stride dear
And walk this road with me

When I'm carried forward by a wave dear
And I'm teetering at it's peak
Promise me you'll ride it with me
Until the horizon reappears

When I have a question to ask
When I have a story to tell
When I have a fear to express my dear
Promise me you will always hear me

When I hatch a brand new scheme
Or another one of my inventions
When my confidence hangs by a thread dear
Promise me you'll always believe

When I'm clearly in the wrong
And I'm taking my time to admit it
Call me out, my dear, by all means
Though it hurts I'll know you still love me

I promise to be with you forever
I promise to love you till time ends
And one more thing
I vow my dear
I promise you my tenderness

Loving you

Loving you is not a misery

The weight of my heart is not a burden

The ball and chain of fidelity

Is as spun from moonbeams light and silken

To see you, I would cover miles

I suffer separation as grief

Thoughts of you yield smiles

Your presence is a relief

Your love like clear water springs

I drink deeply and find healing

I dance with joy as my heart sings

Caught up in the glory of what I'm feeling

Loving you is not a misery

The weight of my heart is not a burden

The ball and chain of fidelity

Is as spun from moonbeams light and silken

Bald as love

Because I could not wash you out

I couldn't wash you out my hair

My hair I chopped it off my head

My head I shaved to a bald shine

They swept the hair across the floor

Across the floor into a pile

A pile they threw out with the trash

The trash: love's final resting place

And in the mirror I thought I saw

I saw you turn and walk away

Away from me and so I turned

I turned and walked the other way

Windowseat

There is no sight more enchanting than you, sitting in a windowseat

head bent over a book, bathed in the light of the setting sun.

My eyes fell upon you, caressing you with wonder, seeing

not just the present but the possible, glorious future. Various

scenes consisting you, or me and you, or us with

others. In an instant my hopes and dreams crystallized

into technicolor, flashing in my mind, dazzling

me with their beauty and reality. Until I found myself

reaching out to touch ...

Your voice brought me back to here and now. Your

smile drew me into the magical spotlight the sun

shone on you and I stepped into the circle, ready

to be enfolded in you. Forever.

Between you and me

Pride stands between you and me

like a bad smell

of a body in a well

the clock sounds the death knell

marking the descent to hell

of what could have been, well,

good.

I can't let go of my illusions

my school-girl fantasies

my feminist sympathies

my chauvinist suspicions

of all your intentions

You can't let go of your expectations

of sweet, obedient acquiescence

or whatever your true ideal of a woman is

(I can no longer pretend to understand

how your mind works)

So we keep vigil at a deathbed

pushing poison to hasten code red

a slanted rehash of what was said

a gassy pair of talking heads

Surely death will do us part

each with half a heart

but pride intact

I find myself in a crowd in a room to which I came with friends to meet other friends

So we orbit in groups or as solo satellites

From group to group or other solo satellites

And I find myself willing our two paths to cross and merge with an excess of cosmic creative energy

And that two formerly solo satellites would spin off on an uncharted tangent

And settle into a brand new orbit

I know I came here with friends to see other friends but I really came here in the off chance I'd see you

Maybe bump into you

Get to talk to you

Friends are cool and all but I kinda like it when they fade into the walls and their voices meld into a steady drone like the a/c

And I get to focus my attention and whatever womanly wiles I may or may not possess on you like homing device on a lunar water-seeking missile/data-collecting gizmo

I'm looking for something

(A signal, perhaps)

And I think I might find it in you

If I could just get close enough to let gravity take effect

Two formerly solo satellites could witness infinity as one

This is Love

Haste makes waste.

Still, I'm in a hurry to

Get misplaced

To be squashed and stuffed into

Space defined by you

Restricted to tick one box

Out of a possible gazillion and two.

Virtual chains and padlocks

Drape around my neck like gangsta bling

Until I can't be seen

For the sheer brilliance

The dazzling brightness

Of your testimonial.

At your insistence

I exceed excess

And recede deeper in denial.

This is love -

All the love I can hope for now -

The concessions I trade for

The right to your arm and your time

Your eyes and your smiles

And maybe someday soon, your name:

The ultimate addition to my collection.